Updated
I should blog more, I think. Practise focussing my thoughts, excercise my literary inclinations, but most of all, to purge all rotten nonsense from my mind in a harmless outlet. Because I think, for me, blogging is an outlet.
I'm not much of a diarist, as you can see. I turn to blogging in low moments of my life, lashing out wildly, or expressing my deep despair in poetry and such. Thus, if I lapse in blogging, it's really a good thing. Really. If there's no "in" there's no "out"let, eh?
Okay, so I am trying to proffer an explanation. I owe Alynna a meme. I'm glad these things don't come with expiry dates. I owe..lessee....who else what? Hmm...nothing more.
My life now is pretty much ...what's that difficult word again...oh yes, .."blah". But "blah" is good. "Blah" means things have settled back into the routine pre-breakup, pre-breakdown days. Life is happening again.
Why, just that day, I met a sexy tight little package. Hooo. Okay, I probably shouldn't refer to women that way, but I never meant it in a derogatory manner. Just that day I was watching a movie and it made me think about my attitude towards women, especially when I'm in a relationship with them. It's not what you may think, I love women. But right now, I can't remember that movie. Damn!
I also had a wonderful dream the other day. I seem to be having a lot of such dreams of late. I don't mean wonderful as in awesome, but as in "full of wonder". I felt like Adam in Wonderland. I mean, dreams are surreal anyway but you never realize it at the time of dreaming, right, only when you recall it. But in my dreams, I was somewhat conscious that the universe I was in was very surreal and defies explanation. I was going about with childlike awe and curiosity. My dreams are a chunk of symbology and Freudian material, I tell ya.
Hmm...so many stories to tell. What shall one do?
I'm not much of a diarist, as you can see. I turn to blogging in low moments of my life, lashing out wildly, or expressing my deep despair in poetry and such. Thus, if I lapse in blogging, it's really a good thing. Really. If there's no "in" there's no "out"let, eh?
Okay, so I am trying to proffer an explanation. I owe Alynna a meme. I'm glad these things don't come with expiry dates. I owe..lessee....who else what? Hmm...nothing more.
My life now is pretty much ...what's that difficult word again...oh yes, .."blah". But "blah" is good. "Blah" means things have settled back into the routine pre-breakup, pre-breakdown days. Life is happening again.
Why, just that day, I met a sexy tight little package. Hooo. Okay, I probably shouldn't refer to women that way, but I never meant it in a derogatory manner. Just that day I was watching a movie and it made me think about my attitude towards women, especially when I'm in a relationship with them. It's not what you may think, I love women. But right now, I can't remember that movie. Damn!
I also had a wonderful dream the other day. I seem to be having a lot of such dreams of late. I don't mean wonderful as in awesome, but as in "full of wonder". I felt like Adam in Wonderland. I mean, dreams are surreal anyway but you never realize it at the time of dreaming, right, only when you recall it. But in my dreams, I was somewhat conscious that the universe I was in was very surreal and defies explanation. I was going about with childlike awe and curiosity. My dreams are a chunk of symbology and Freudian material, I tell ya.
Hmm...so many stories to tell. What shall one do?
posted by caffeinated at 8:53 PM
7 Comments:
BwAhAHA!!~~ you're back ;p
Seems everything is going back on track for you. =) Yay~
Hmm..was there that rabbit with the clock in your dream? haha..
One shall tell all those stories and I will read them patiently. =)
Do I sense a calm before the storm... probably not! Good on you mate! Back on the saddle... of life I mean... not necessarily relationships... but if that works for ya then... well it works for you...
Speaking of dreams though... I'm one of those people who never remember them... once woke up in cold sweat... but didn't know what I woke up form... heat pumping like mad... scary... and weirdly invigorating... (loooong time ago mind you... must have been when I was dating Iru... hehehe.... ok PLEASE be nice Rabbit…)
Rawr: the rabbit with the clock..hmmm...what a deja vu. stop messing with my mind :)
Aindhy: Iru huh? haha, hey, you brought her up, not me.
actually....i am trying to peel off the layers & layers of unresolved conflicts and hopefully at the end of it all, i will find that what i thought i wanted is what i really want.
who really knows what they really want? the word 'want' is always subjected to circumstances and needs...and we all know by now how fast that can change.
do YOU know what you want? =)
I did bring her up didn't I? Cest le vei (or is it vie... DAMN the Franch!... errr don't read too much into that... I acutally am not racist... err I think... right or not Rabbit?!?!)
We truly need to move on my friend... even though i bring her up... from time to time... I have... I've no regrets... had I to do it over... I would have done the same... would not have changed a thing... welll... maybe one thing... but thats a story for another day...
Walk on my friend...
I had a dream the other night where I was the zoom function on a video camera! Cool!
Hi minimoo: see, even you can't say about what you want without there having to be additional layers of complexity.
What do I want? It's unusually mundane: I want love, money, job satisfaction, good friends.
Thanks Aindhy. You type high, but I know it's not possible. Unless you've got some stash, you smuggler!
A Jones: Really? I bet you weren't bird watching of the avian kind. :)
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